Wednesday, October 26, 2016


" You cannot see your reflection in running water,
it is only when the water is calm
that you can see."

Lately I have been finding my calm.
Family + Friends + home = the perfect trifecta for calm.
Also spending time enjoying...
more phone calls, less Facebook.
More books, less internet.
More nature. More nature. More nature.
Grateful for all the little things October has delivered.
Grateful for a God that always knows what I need.
Feeling the happiness of all the moments in my heart.

finding my calm
the way family fills me up, like nothing else.
the gorgeous autumns in New England
the way I can be inspired over munching zucchini bread , sipping a cocktail, 
and deep conversations in a friends back yard
friends that start up where we left off
colorful leaves


Monday, October 10, 2016

Celebrate Life

" Love yourself...
 enough to take the actions required for your happiness...
enough to cut yourself loose from the drama-filled past...
enough to set a high standard for relationships...
enough to feed your mind and body in a healthy manner...
enough to forgive yourself...
enough to move on."

We celebrated our birthdays, and this great big beautiful life.
The breeze blew, and the birds chirped.
I hope that she felt how much I loved her.
I hope she knows that even though our relationship hasn't always been easy,
that I love her with all of my heart.
Take the time to tell the people you love,
just how much they mean to you.
Hug them tight, in a squeeze-their-guts-out-hug...
and give them a big smoochie on the cheek...
just because you can. :)

being surrounded by country.
mom singing to the birds...
the birds singing back
playing ball with the dogs
cows in the pasture
pine trees
watching our favorite show together
laughing over silly things 
celebrating our birthdays together
my mom


Tuesday, October 4, 2016


Fifty-four years me.
It's a bit unbelievable that I have been here that long. :) 
I have so much more I want to do, learn,
love, and explore.
I am going into this fifty-fourth year,
feeling more powerful and passionate,
and stronger than I have ever felt in my life.
I am learning to let go of the past...
{it's funny how you think you have, until you realize you haven't.}
to forgive...
{because it just keeps me guarded and bitter, and that is just YUCK! }
and to get out of my own way ...
{or try to be aware of when I am going to trip myself up...with insecurities, doubt, fear. Stupid!}

Alley Mill

my tag along

yup. love him.

hiking with me. hates heights.

Rocky Falls

caught a tadpole

hubby found a heart/friendship rock.  He rocks ! :)

This birthday...I am feeling empowered. Encouraged. Inspired. 
And most importantly ...Loved.
{funny thing about love I have realized...that it's always there. Sometimes you just have remove the walls you've built for protection... and let that love-stuff seep in !}
I will continue to believe that what we seek we will find.
 I will continue to seek the beauty.
and Peace.
I will seek laughter.
and Miracles.
I will also *whisper* a "thank you" into the breeze...
and *blow a kiss to the heavens.
I will thank God for all 19711 days I have been blessed to be here.
And I will thank him everyday for this wonderful life, and everyone in it. Always.

FB on my Birthday
New places to explore
Hiking with my hubby
Birthday cupcakes
birthday cards
hearing hubby sing me the B-Day song :)
my mom calling and singing the B-Day song on every birthday. I know I will miss that some day.
my animals..
 God . I couldn't have done any of it with out Him.

There is joy, happiness and love to be found everywhere.
We need only look. :)
Happy October !! 

Wednesday, September 28, 2016

Dear Younger Me | MercyMe


The weather has been FABULOUS !!
With that said ...this is NOT where I want to sit and ponder.
I love to share with you...really !
BUT...right now my inspiration is high...
and my words are few.
I want to tell you about how smart my hubby is...

and about his 45th reunion with his classmates from Veterinarian school.
Oh...and what a fun AND kind circle of lovely souls they all are !!!
I want to brag about my awesome girlfriend who won't let me lessen myself 
with stupid talk...and inspires me with her dedication to good health and her honesty.
I want to mention new friends, and hopes shared with them.
I want to catch up about Brandon and how he is having to make lots of decisions, 
and planning his way after college... and how endlessly proud I am of him.
I want to giggle with you about Oliver and his shenanigans.

I want to share my thoughts
and my feelings about life and some of the freaky crap that goes on in my head.
I want to woo woo about photography class, and how I struggle with the camera.
There is so much I want to share, but the breeze blowing through the windows...
and the feeling of change in the air,
is tooooooo much !!! 
I love this weather.  I want to be outside !!

I can't sit here long enough to come up with all the words I want to say.
And then even as I sit here writing this...
I often question myself.
Why any of this matters to anyone other than me.
Why am I not outside now ?
Why write about this stuff ?
Honestly...I don't know. 
It is something that I can look back on.
It's change.
It's growth.
it's something that is a part of me...
and hopefully will always be...
even when I am no longer a part of me. :)

There was a song that pulled at my heart-strings this week.
I have heard it many times....but it never really hit me like it hit me 
this time.
I think as a parent, and as an adult that struggles with all the 
"stuff" we tend to allow our minds to swash around on,
this song just hit that tender spot in me.
I sit here and savor the words.
I think we tend to be a little too hard on ourselves.
We want to have life figured out.
We sometimes wish we could have done things differently.
We often focus more on our faults, and think something is wrong with us.
Completely normal ! We're Human ! What is wrong with us is....
We forget that we are special.
 I hope you remember that ! Always !
I hope this song makes you feel happy in your heart...
and makes you feel a little lighter on the inside. :)


Mercy Me
Dear Younger Me....

 accidentally took my own picture....but I kinda like it :) except for my misshapen arm. :)

Dear younger me,
Where do I start ?
If I could tell you everything, that I have learned so far.
Then you could be, one step ahead,
 of all the painful memories still running through my head.
I wonder how much  different things would be?
Dear younger me.
I cannot decide ,
Do I give some speech about how to get the most out of your life ?
Or do I go deep
and try to change the choices that you'll make ?
Cuz they're choices that made me.
Even though I love this crazy life.
Sometimes I wish it was a smoother ride..
dear younger me.
If I knew then what I know now,
condemnation would've had no power.
My joy my pain would've never been my worth.
If I knew that what I know now...
would've not been hard to figure out, what I would've changed if I had heard...
Dear younger me,
It's not your fault.
You were never meant to carry this beyond the cross.
You are holy . You are righteous. You are one of the redeemed.
Set apart
a brand new heart
you are free indeed.
Every mountain, every valley
thru each heartache you will see
every moment brings you closer to who you were meant to be...
dear younger me.

this song
bike rides
reading on the porch
windows all open
hoodie's in the morning
hot tea
leaves changing color
songs that pack a punch


P.S I am posting the video of the song for you in another post. :)
Dear Younger Me.
Give it a listen.
Happy Fall. :)

Thursday, September 22, 2016


A misty foggy morning.
Revealing what we can not see.
Dew laden webs glistening with pearls...
sparkling, flowing and free.
Mindful of the unhurried artist.
Slowly spinning each thread.
Taking each step with her heart...
and not being all up in her head.

Reminding me of life and the special ways...
that God reveals Himself in ...
the darkest and foggiest of days.
Sometimes we struggle to be still and listen...
and sometimes we're drawn closer by gifts that glisten.

morning dew
natural wonders
meeting the artist :)
the little things
the hushing of the fog
God in nature


Monday, September 19, 2016


I wasn't supposed to "get attached".
BUT I did !
For three weeks, I have been this little guys mama.
I call him Bubby.
Although he hasn't been here very long...
he has found a very special place in my heart.

graham crackers & milk


Maybe it's the look he gives me while he stands so patiently at the door waiting for his bottle.
Maybe it's because he follows me around as I do my morning chores & licks me when I'm not looking.
Maybe it because he loves to have his face and dewlap scratched, and he loves to cuddle.
Maybe it's the way he found his little spot in the hay in the pet-shack, so he could sleep with Scotty and Oliver.
Maybe because Oliver shares his graham crackers with him,
and he shares his calf meringue with Scotty.
Maybe it's because I carry a towel around with me, (to wipe of the slobbers) and now
he uses the towel like a blankie. 
Maybe it's the way he chases me to the door, and then once inside, he sits there and thumps to see if I will bring him a snack.
Maybe because he has fit into our little world so perfectly, that it seems he should stay.
If  I could keep him here, he would no doubt grow old along with Oliver and Scotty.
They would be great lets-butt-heads-and-eat -graham-cracker buddies.
However... I anticipate him leaving this week.
The lump in my throat is getting harder to swallow.
I will be sending along his blankie and some graham crackers...
and will be giving him lots of extra lovin' until he goes.
In the meantime I'll sit here and enjoy watching him curled up napping on the patio,
right below Oliver who is napping on the bench.*sigh
Thankful for the time I got to be his mama. :)
We're sure going to miss the little stinker!

Knowing he is going to a good home
the way animals just get along
babies and their blankies
graham cracker junkies
the sound of little hoof feet chasing me in the yard
sweet calf noses
drippy calf meringue :)